toilets and other exciting things

Continuing on my "con-de-struction" explorations, today I had the ... enlightening experience of purchasing a toilet.  Now the world of toilets holds rather interesting surprises for the novice.  We have the Sloan Flushmate Flushometer System, one piece gravity toilets, dual flush systems, designer toilets, toilets with sinks on the tank, loud toilets, quiet toilets, round seats, elongated seats, high toilets, short toilets, one piece toilets, 2 part toilets ... yes, what an expansive world of toilets.

Of course we have your basic "toilet humor".  Among these exciting choices I found Mr. Bean and the toilet.  I hope you'll enjoy the link.  Then there was this gag website where you can actually purchase toilet monsters!!  These things (green or red) actually attach to your bowl and lid so that when some poor unsuspecting friend or family member innocently goes to the water closet to descreatly "take care of things" upon opening the seat, UP pops this hideous monster scaring the c___ out of them.

So, I'm sure you're wondering with all these choices what did Pam get.  Well, I got the Sydney Smart dual flush toilet 305.  This is a high efficiency toilet with two buttons on top, the "half-flush" and the "full-flush".  Now a friend of mine asked me, "Uh, Pam, is the "half-flush" for when you ___ and the "full-flush" for the other?"  Well, now there would be a good question.  According the the salesperson (yes, I did ask), this toilet is SO powerful and is virtually unblockable, therefore, one should never need the "full-flush".  I say, we'll see when the kids come to visit just how unblockable it is.  :)  Oh, I almost forgot to mention the quite exciting toilet seat.  This would be the "soft closing" elongated seat.  That's right folks, you know those drawers and cabinet doors that no matter how hard you try you can't slam them.  Well, here is a toilet seat that closes itself in a dignified and quiet manner.  The "male" salesperson assured me that this is one seat men will always close.  Now that's a selling point!

Oh, and it sells for over $500 and I got it for $150.  That closed the deal.